I would enter a heartbreaking cycle where I would buy a melon, be bitterly disappointed in its underripeness, not buy a melon for a while, forget I had the melon, remember I bought the melon and have the most perfect melon in the world, go buy a melon and have it be under-ripe and then not buy a melon for a while. This doesn’t work for watermelons. Watermelons should be consumed as is, but look for the heaviest melon that has the biggest white/yellow mark on the side.

But there is a way out of this heartbreak if you like honeydew or cantaloupe. With my stomach issues, melon is the perfect food to have for breakfast and lunch, which then lets me have a reasonable supper and be good for the day. So I’m going to suggest buying four. But if you want to do this with two, that works fine, too.

1. Buy more than one melon.

2. Put one melon in a paper bag or a ripening bowl with a ripe banana or apple. Leave them together for two days.

3. Enjoy melon.

4. Put the next melon in the banana/apple ripening device for at least a day. If it gives when you squeeze and the flower end smells ripe, eat it then. If it isn’t, leave it for another day.

5. Any melon you’ve purchased beyond the two that you’ve sped up the ripening process for should now be ripe just sitting on the counter. Consume at will.

Melons don’t get any more sweeter once you pick them off the vine, but they can soften and get juicier. Pick heavier melons than lighter melons to start with and look for melons that have a whiter spot on them where they have sat on the ground and ripened.